Posted by Slashfood.com on October 26, 2009 at 11:36:58:
'The Next Iron Chef' - Is Jeffrey Steingarten a Culinary Simon Cowell?
by Michael Thomas Hastings
Let us pause now to reflect upon Jeffrey Steingarten, award-winning writer, fearless gastronomist and utterly irascible judge of "The Next Iron Chef." Every cooking competition show needs its Simon Cowell, after all, a grumpy, hard-to-please, perpetually underwhelmed quipster whose general lack of enthusiasm makes for great, nasty sound bites. But Steingarten is in another class entirely: He's so disaffected, it's hard to tell if he's got a pulse half of the time.
Week after week, Steingarten regards the Iron Chef hopefuls in the same way a crusty professor might deal with a snot-nosed student who happened to stop by his office outside of office hours. The man may certainly have his cheerful side, but by now we've gotten the feeling that every week, the "TNIC" editors decide to save up and splice together all of his best "You got me out of bed for this?" looks, and parse them out over the course of the last 15 minutes of each show.
When in doubt, they zoom in on one of his particularly befuddled stares -- no doubt there are plenty to choose from -- and try to give it some sort of significance, as if the man can't believe what he's hearing. You imagine that a Steingarten comment like "my flan is a little curdled" was probably delivered politely, gingerly to chef Jose Garces -- but when the tribal drums of failure are added to the soundtrack, man, does it take on a sting.
This week's challenge involved the "adaptability" of tamarind, and was full of choice Steingarten moments, whether he was tipping back a thick chocolate-tamarind shot, puzzling at the taste of a sake-tamarind cocktail or awkwardly scarfing down a shrimp-tamarind taco. Though we delight in seeing him get the goat of fellow panel member Donatella Arpaia -- who lets no Steingarten comment, no matter how innocuous, go unheeded -- there was little conflict Sunday night, save for a trumped-up debate over some hominy that delighted Arpaia and made Steingarten look like he was chewing his cud.
The true Steingarten delight was reserved for brash, competitive Jehangir Mehta, who finally managed to pull off a savory-sweet ice cream without the machinery backfiring on him. Meanwhile, the night's reject, Dominque Crenn, was not going down without a fight. "I disagree," she snapped when sent away from the judge's table, becoming the first true "TNIC" martyr this season. Note that she was careful, however, not to say it to Steingarten's face.
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